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Become the leader you want to be: The Power of Cognizance & Context

Posted by: Jackie Sarmiento Cañiza| HCC, PCC, CNTC    |    Posted on . Posted in Journal.

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In our model for leadership, we cover six practices that we’ve found to be meaningful in taking a human-centered approach. Cognizance, Context, Cause, Courage, Care, and Co-creation. Typically, we begin our exploration with the practice of Cognizance, defined as the practice of raising awareness of our impact.

As leaders, we have the opportunity to create a significant impact on our teams and our organizations. But how aware are we of that impact? Do we know what our inherent strengths are? Do we understand what our weaknesses are? And do we know how these affect the people we work with? In our work with leaders from various levels and companies, the practice of cognizance seems to be the one they would like to improve on the most, so we co-create spaces where leaders feel safe to receive feedback, learn about their values and motivations, and explore how they might bring out better awareness of their team members’ values and motivations as well. It’s not an easy process but the gains we’ve observed have been quite significant. 

What makes the practice of Cognizance so important? According to a study by Showry and Manasa (2014), successful leadership comes about when one is self-aware. Conversely, when leaders overestimate their abilities it is correlated to lower performance (Bratton et al, 2011). Having a more accurate view of oneself and one’s team members is a critical practice which can help us become more human-centered leaders.

Gaining awareness, as previously mentioned, is simply the place to begin. Cognizance without Context may not be as effective. This is the practice of navigating within a system. Having an understanding of what your business environment requires, what your company directions are, and what your team dynamics look like – all play an important role in determining what is required of us as leaders. Any change in these factors may change what is required of you as a leader. Systems thinking has also been linked to leadership performance (Palaima & Skaržauskienė, 2010), where a one-size-fits-all approach may not be the ideal. A good question to ask oneself is how we are continuously seeking to understand the needs of our organization based on the changes occurring both in and out of the company.

Over the coming months, we will dive into the rest of the practices and in the meantime I encourage you to reflect on what you can do in the next few weeks to enhance your practice of Cognizance and Context.

Year-End Reflection: A Step-by-Step Guide for a Brighter Future

Posted by: Mia Gabrielle del Rosario-Domingo | PCC    |    Posted on . Posted in Journal.

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As the year comes to a close, it’s a great time to pause and reflect on the journey we’ve been on. Just like a seasoned traveler who takes a moment to admire the view before embarking on a new adventure, let’s take a moment to look back and savor the experiences and lessons from the past year.

The Power of Reflection

Reflecting on the past year is more than just an exercise in nostalgia. In fact, research has found that reflecting on past experiences can help us gain insights into our behavior patterns, emotions, and motivations (Kross & Ayduk, 2010). This self-awareness can lead to increased self-regulation and improved decision-making.

A Deep Dive into Reflection

To maximize the benefits of reflection, consider these questions when looking back at the year that was:

  • What were your biggest accomplishments? Celebrating our successes, no matter how small, boosts our self-esteem and motivates us for future endeavors. 
  • What were your biggest challenges? As humans, it is natural for us to face challenges and setbacks. It is t how we respond to them that shapes our character. Reflect on the obstacles you faced. What did you learn from these experiences? How did you grow as a result?
  • What brought you joy and fulfillment? Recall the moments that brought you happiness and a sense of purpose. Were there specific relationships, hobbies, or activities that nourished your soul? 
  • What areas could you improve upon? We are constantly evolving. Honest self-assessment is a powerful tool for growth. Identify areas where you could develop further. Are there habits you’d like to cultivate, or skills you’d like to enhance?
  • Based on your answers to the previous questions, what themes are coming out? What is most important to you? Our answers point to what we value most; these may help guide us in envisioning what we want to work towards in the future.

Setting Intentions for a Brighter Future

Now that you’ve taken a moment to reflect on the past year, it’s time to set your intentions for the future. We at Haraya have found that goals are more easily and sustainably achieved when we start with a purposeful mindset and clear intentions during goal setting. Some possible prompts to get you started on goal setting:

  • Based on the themes and values that are important to you, what would you like to achieve by the end of next year? It can be helpful to take a moment to envision how your life might be different by then.
  • By the end of next year, how do you want to be different? Sometimes, our goals may not necessarily be about external achievements but about internal growth and development. What needs to change in you to bring you closer to your desired future?

The Science of Effective Goal Setting

Research has consistently shown that setting specific, challenging, and achievable goals can significantly improve performance and motivation (Locke & Latham, 1990). 

When reviewing the goals you have set, consider the following:

  • Specificity: Clearly define your goals. Instead of a vague goal like “I want to be healthier,” aim for a specific goal like “I will exercise for 30 minutes, three times a week.”
  • Challenge: Set goals that push you outside your comfort zone, but are still attainable. Challenging goals can increase motivation and satisfaction.
  • Commitment: Make a conscious cjommitment to your goals. This involves actively visualizing your success and believing in your ability to achieve it.
  • Feedback: Regularly assess your progress. This can help you stay on track and make adjustments as needed.
  • Celebrating Quick Wins:  To help in sustaining momentum, define your quicks wins or checkpoints where you will celebrate your progress. Identify what celebration you will want to do at each checkpoint.
  • Task Strategy: Develop a specific plan of action to achieve your goals. Break down large goals into smaller, manageable steps.

Cultivating a Growth Mindset

A key ingredient for success is a growth mindset, the belief that abilities and intelligence can be developed through dedication and hard work. By embracing challenges as opportunities for growth, you can overcome obstacles and achieve your goals.  

The journey of self-improvement is a lifelong one. Be patient with yourself, embrace the process, and enjoy the ride.

Would you like further support in reflecting on the year that was or would like to have an accountability partner to reach your goals? Our Haraya coaches are here to help. Simply message us via our website or social media channels (@harayacoaching on FB, IG and LinkedIn). You can also directly book a session with our coaches in MindYou.

Sources:

Ayduk, O., & Kross, E. (2010). From a distance: implications of spontaneous self-distancing for adaptive self-reflection. Journal of personality and social psychology, 98(5), 809–829. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0019205

Locke, E. A., & Latham, G. P. (1990). A theory of goal setting & task performance. Prentice Hall.

Bringing Kapwa and Meaningful Connection Into the Workplace

Posted by: Jen Horn, Certified Coach | ACC    |    Posted on . Posted in Journal.

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Since I started coaching with Haraya in 2021, and when I started co-producing and writing episodes for The Imaginable Workplace podcast, I’ve thought quite a bit about what makes a workplace feel truly alive. Not just busy or productive, but genuinely alive—with people who feel they belong, who are comfortable showing up as their full selves, and who actually enjoy working together. For me, a big part of that has to do with kapwa, meaning “fellow being” (as opposed to “other”), a concept from Filipino psychology or Sikolohiyang Pilipino.

Kapwa is about recognizing our shared humanity; understanding that we’re all connected. At its deepest level, kapwa is about valuing justice, dignity and freedom, and this is reflected in the intentions and aspirations of maka-kapwang ugnayan. (1) It’s seeing each other as whole people, not just as coworkers or email signatures. Interestingly, “Haraya” in Swahili means pride, dignity, and freedom, which feels like a nice fit for what kapwa is all about, too.

So, how might we create more of this kind of culture at work?

Kapwa: A Different Way of Relating

In a previous article I wrote, I explored how kapwa is an invitation to really see each other—to go beyond the roles and titles, and connect on a human level (1).

When I think about the places where I’ve felt the most connected at work, it’s always been because someone took the time to listen or show a little kindness. It’s about simple things: asking how someone is really doing, or taking a moment to appreciate their specific efforts. These small actions can transform how we feel about where we work and who we work with. 

This also surfaced in some of the conversations we’ve had on the podcast, such as episodes with Jun Cabochan of Pandayan Bookstore sharing his Diwa at Kapwa approach to management (2), and Jen Garcia of Zuellig sharing the simple practice of asking someone how they’re doing, and really asking it again like we mean it. (3)

Connection: The Backbone of Strong, Healthy Teams

In today’s fast-paced and often remote workplaces, meaningful connection can feel like a luxury. But I’d argue it’s essential. When people feel truly connected, they feel safe enough to bring their ideas to the table, to collaborate freely, and to express themselves honestly. 

We can take cues from nature on the value of connection.In nature, “mycelium, the thread-like formation that makes up most fungi, connects roots to one another, allowing plants and trees to communicate with one another to create healthier ecosystems. It forms the largest network — a mycorrhizal network, a “wood-wide web” — beneath the earth.” (4).

When we create an environment where people can speak up, feel that their voices matter and are heard, we strengthen an underground root system that can help us weather storms as a team. That doesn’t happen by accident; it happens when we make intentional space for real conversations, show up with authenticity, and lead with empathy. (5). 

Creating a Culture of Belonging and Wellbeing

Wellbeing is something we often think about in terms of physical or mental health, but it’s also deeply social. In another article, I explored how our wellbeing is connected to the relationships we build and the communities we’re part of (6). When we feel connected to others, we feel more at ease, more energized, and more able to face challenges. This involves a shared practice of pakikipagkapwa. 

What might this look like?

  1. Start conversations that matter: Make time for real talk—whether it’s during team check-ins or over coffee. Ask questions that go beyond “How are you?” and invite people to share their stories.
  2. Practice mindful listening: It sounds obvious, but really listening—without interrupting or thinking about what to say next—can be a game-changer. It shows people you care about what they have to say.
  3. Celebrate diversity and shared humanity: Acknowledge the unique contributions each person brings, but also find those common threads that connect us all. We all want to feel seen and appreciated.
  4. Lead with vulnerability and care: Whether you’re a leader or a teammate, opening up about your own challenges creates space for others to be themselves too. Small gestures, like checking in or offering help, can also build a culture where people feel genuinely cared for and connected.

As you think about these practices and your own current habits, you can reflect on the following questions:

  • What is my mindset when it comes to connecting with my team?
  • When listening in conversations, do I pay attention to how I’m listening? Do I listen with a focus on myself or my kapwa?
  • What threads connect me with my team? What differences can I celebrate?
  • What does support from my team and my leaders look like to me?
  • What does support for my team and my leaders look like to them?

Moving Forward with Kapwa and Haraya

Embracing kapwa and the spirit of Haraya isn’t about overhauling the entire workplace overnight. It’s about intentional, everyday choices that help us see each other more clearly, listen more deeply, and connect more meaningfully. These values aren’t just cultural concepts—they’re practical tools we can use to create workplaces that are more inclusive, creative, and alive (4); cultures where we co-vision our imaginable workplace and co-create it with purpose and consistency over time. 

What might cultivating this kind of culture unlock for you and your organization?

Learn more about how to make your imaginable workplace a reality with Haraya’s organizational transformation programs for leadership, culture-building and wellbeing here.

***

Jen Horn is a facilitator, coach and writer, born and raised in the Philippines. She cultivates connection through spaces for reflection and conversation on @pagbubuo, as co-creator of Ugnayan Cards, as chapter lead of Culture First Manila, and as a facilitator of leadership and culture-building programs for individual and organizational transformation. Her curiosities and practice lie in the intersections of culture, creativity, and the wellbeing of the individual, communities and the natural world. Learn more about her work via bit.ly/jenhorn.

Footnotes:

  1. Horn, J. (2024a). Pagbubuo ng Maka-kapwang Ugnayan: A framework for meaningful connection. Pagbubuo with Jen Horn on Substack.
  2. Joven, M. & Horn, J. (2023) Courageous feedback grows high-performing teams. The Imaginable Workplace podcast.
  3. Joven, M. & Horn, J. (2022) Imagine an office that supports your mental health. The Imaginable Workplace podcast.
  4. Horn, J. (2024b). Kapwa at Ginhawa: Expanding our circles for collective wellbeing. Mga Liham ng Ugnayan on Substack.
  5. Horn, J. (2024c). Pakikipag-Ugnayan: On returning to authentic and meaningful connection. Pagbubuo with Jen Horn on Substack.

Horn, J. (2024d). The Pursuit of Flourishing: A holistic understanding of happiness and wellbeing. Pagbubuo with Jen Horn on Substack.

Challenging Workplace Well-being Initiatives Through the PERMA Model

Posted by: Matthew Sy, Certified Coach | PCC    |    Posted on . Posted in Journal.

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Investing in an organization’s workplace well-being has been increasingly recognized as integral to achieving organizational success. While there are numerous approaches to understanding and supporting well-being, The PERMA model, developed by Dr. Martin Seligman, offers a valuable framework for framing how we can promote psychological well-being in the workplace. The model focuses on five core elements: Positive Emotions, Engagement, Relationships, Meaning, and Accomplishment. By integrating these elements into workplace well-being initiatives, organizations can move beyond simply mitigating problems to fostering a thriving work environment.

Each of the core elements can guide us in strategizing the next set of interventions of support we’d like to focus on.

Positive Emotions

Starting with Positive Emotions, this element explores how we can prioritize initiatives or practices that encourage emotions such as gratitude, optimism, and joy through practices such as celebrating small wins, checking in with one another, and fostering a culture of acknowledgment.

A question we can ask ourselves: What can we prioritize to encourage celebration, gratitude, and optimism in the team?

Engagement

The second element of the PERMA framework is Engagement. It focuses on understanding how creating opportunities for employees to experience a sense of “flow” can be beneficial to their sense of well-being. Rather than having a sole focus on promoting work-life balance, this component of the model highlights initiatives that allow employees to experience deep engagement in their work can be beneficial for them. This can be achieved by providing opportunities for skill development and offering challenging yet achievable goals. Through a healthy level of engagement, they are more likely to find fulfillment in their work.

A question we can ask ourselves: What opportunities can we provide to help employees find deeper engagement and flow in their tasks and roles?

Relationships

Relationships are well-known as a key factor in promoting well-being. The PERMA model further highlights this by emphasizing the significance of developing quality relationships and environments that cultures that support open communication & collaboration. Organizations that invest in team-building activities, mentoring sessions, and social events can build a sense of community where employees feel they belong.

A question we can ask ourselves: How can we foster stronger, more meaningful connections and support systems among employees to enhance their sense of belonging?

Meaning

While external motivators such as financial incentives are important, the PERMA model asks the question of how Meaning can be included in the workplace. Research has shown that employees who feel a sense of connectedness to their purpose at work are more likely to experience lasting positive levels of well-being. Leaders can support employees create this connectedness through clear communication of the impact of their work, aligning their contributions to the employee’s values, and lastly, offering ad-hoc opportunities for more meaningful work.

A question we can ask ourselves: In what ways can we align employees’ individual roles with a greater sense of purpose and meaning within the organization?

Accomplishment

Finally, the PERMA model challenges the traditional emphasis on avoiding failure by promoting a focus on Accomplishment. Encouraging a growth mindset, where employees are recognized for their efforts and progress rather than just their outcomes, can foster a culture of continuous improvement. Organizations can support this by setting clear, achievable goals, providing regular feedback, and celebrating milestones. When employees feel a sense of accomplishment, their confidence and motivation increase, contributing to overall psychological well-being.

A question we can ask ourselves: How can we better recognize and celebrate employees’ achievements to promote a sense of accomplishment and continuous growth?

Coaching as an Approach to Well-being

The application of the PERMA model can be daunting from the get-go. However, working with a coach is one concrete way to help promote reflection and turn ideas into action. The coaching methodology aligns with the PERMA model in empowering the individual to come up with solutions to designing interventions for each of the factors in the model. In Haraya, we use internal frameworks, such as our emotional dashboard, to prompt discussions amongst employees to check in with themselves on how they are doing. 

Overall, the PERMA model offers a comprehensive approach to promoting psychological well-being in the workplace. By focusing on Positive Emotions, Engagement, Relationships, Meaning, and Accomplishment, organizations can create a work environment that fosters a thriving, positive culture where its employees feel a sense of belonging and meaning. Integrating the PERMA model into workplace well-being initiatives allows for a more holistic and effective strategy, ultimately leading to enhanced employee satisfaction, productivity, and organizational success.

What We Can Learn About Leadership From Neuroscience

Posted by: Jackie Sarmiento Cañiza, Certified Coach | PCC, CNTC    |    Posted on . Posted in Journal.

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My fascination with neuroscience began over a decade ago when I was attending a Leadership program at MIT. One of our professors happened to be a neuroscientist and I thought it was interesting that she would be teaching a leadership class. I’ve attended many leadership programs before then but I hadn’t come across anyone talking about it from a scientific view. But once the lectures started, it made perfect sense. Leaders have a big influence on people’s thoughts, emotions and behaviors – to the point of driving success or failure of teams or organizations. I thought it was a great way of learning more about leadership, to understand the neuroscience behind our decisions, feelings and actions. I was hooked. Every opportunity I could find to learn more about the brain and nervous system, I invested in. I loved having a deeper understanding of what makes leadership attributes work and knowing what happens in our bodies as we respond to leadership stimuli. In my pursuit of more knowledge, I realized how our practices as leaders and coaches need to be better-grounded on science and research, and not just on the latest book that comes out with a cool or punchy title (although I have to admit I’ve enjoyed reading some of them). While these may be useful, it would be even more useful if we understood why these principles work and when they work by looking at the human mind.

For example, I learned that:

  • through a process called neuroplasticity, leaders can help themselves and their team members grow and develop in more meaningful ways;
  • having a sense of purpose promotes brain health and better wellbeing; and
  • experiencing things together with our teams synchronizes our brains and makes us feel more connected.

These are just some of the many insights I’ve gained from studying the nervous system. So, together with my team, we embarked on a journey to ground our Haraya practices with even more data, science and research. We are constantly gathering inputs, from the latest studies to on-the-ground insights our clients openly share with us. By combining these sources of information, we feel more confident in sharing our models and frameworks with the coaches and leaders we work with.

Our leadership model, for example, was brought together through deep conversations that we had with clients when the Covid pandemic first hit. We thought it would be a relevant model just for that period, but our research and data told us that these practices are very much useful beyond that time. It has continuously evolved together with our team’s ongoing learning, and we now have 6 solid leadership practices that we share:

We call it our Tunsayan model. It’s a play on two FIlipino words that mean authentic (tunay) and practices (sanayan). Through this model, we hope to answer the question, “How do I practice leadership in a way that honors my authentic self, the authentic selves of the team members I work with, all while meeting the needs of the organization I am a part of?”

As we work with more and more leaders and teams, we continue to learn about these practices and how they help. But just like scientists, our curiosity keeps bringing us new and different discoveries. For now, we are happy with what we know so far and even happier to share it with anyone who is as curious as we are.

Celebrating Being Average

Posted by: Jackie Sarmiento Cañiza Certified Coach | PCC, CNTC    |    Posted on . Posted in Journal.

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I’m not sure how common this experience is and maybe you can tell me. I will sometimes find
myself scrolling through my newsfeed on social media and experiencing feelings of inadequacy,
lacking, or not-enough-ness. I read all the stories about others being the best, the top, or
achieving much success and, while I celebrate their joys (I truly do), I can’t help but feel a bit of
sting as I look inward. I ask myself, “what do you have to show for?” or “what are you the best
at?” and then I quickly go to “maybe you’re just jealous” or “why can’t you just be happy for
them and leave it at that?”
I’ve been reflecting on this experience and thought it might be worthwhile sharing just in case
others are experiencing the same thing. I like to think of myself as average so there’s a pretty
good chance the other average ones may understand these sentiments. In my reflections, I
decided that, instead of trying to find what I have to show for, it might be helpful to think about
what makes me average and celebrate that instead. Just for context, here is the definition of
average that I’m using as reference: of the usual or ordinary standard, level, or quantity.
Here’s an initial list of my averages:

  1. I’m an average student. I never really received high grades and even now, as I take a
    master’s program in a topic I find fascinating, I’m still performing at an average mark
    despite a lot of effort I’m putting into my studies. I recently received my average grade
    for my latest module and am over the moon about it!
  2. I’m an average reader. I like buying books that I find interesting and will take forever to
    read them (if I even get to it) and I cannot, for the life of me, quote passages or one-
    liners in an intellectual conversation. When I do get to finish a book, I feel so
    accomplished!
  3. I’m an average cook. I enjoy preparing meals for my family and friends and I can follow a
    recipe well enough, and while serving it I will ask “Do you like it?” just because no one is
    commenting about the food. And if they say, “Yeah it’s good!” I celebrate that even if
    they’re just trying to be polite or thankful that I didn’t mess it up so badly.
  4. I’m an average athlete. I was never the strongest rower or runner in my team and there
    were always others who had natural strengths in whatever sport they got into. I have to
    exert extra effort to get by and would find my space in the middle of the pack and enjoy
    myself there.
  5. I’m an average entrepreneur. I’ve been running a business for over a decade, and we’ve
    scaled it to an average size, and I still stay up at night worrying about the next pay cycles
    and keeping things afloat. I celebrate the moments when we get through the difficult
    times together with my team.
    I can add so much more to this list, but I don’t really feel a need to. It’s an average amount to
    reinforce just how average I am. Please don’t mistake this article to mean I am looking for
    affirmation on things I’m great at. I like to think I’m aware of the things I can do quite well. I just
    thought it would be nice for a change to allow ourselves to celebrate being average because

most of us are and that’s perfectly okay. I’d love to hear your average stories so I can celebrate them with you!

How Coaching and Therapy Supported my Mental Health

Posted by: Jackie Sarmiento Cañiza, Certified Coach | PCC, CNTC    |    Posted on . Posted in Journal.

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It may be a coincidence that October 10 is both the anniversary of Haraya Coaching and the commemoration of World Mental Health Day, and for the past 11 years that we’ve grown in our practice, I am more convinced that it is a meaningful integration. I’ve personally seen how coaching can support mental wellness and I feel so much more resolve to share how this is true. I am often asked about the difference between coaching and therapy, and while there are many resources one might find online, and I could share more formal definitions of these practices, I thought it would be useful to share my own personal stories of how both modalities have helped me.

Coaching helped me re-design my life and move forward.
I was diagnosed with stage 3 breast cancer in 2018 and had a wonderful support system around me. Loved ones were around to be with me all throughout my journey and I never really felt alone. I knew I was loved and that gave me a lot of strength. It was initially difficult though, for me to see beyond my illness. I couldn’t see too far into the future and worried about others around me. How would I continue to make a difference and contribute to the world? I felt I was being derailed from my life plans. I was so blessed that a friend offered to coach me through my cancer journey and allowed me to reflect on how this experience integrates into my life and I found a new sense of purpose – one that did not disregard my cancer but embraced it as a blessing that could help me become a different version of me. Coaching supported me in the
design of that new purpose and in taking accountability for making it real.

Therapy helped me understand my inner thoughts and feelings.
Fast-forward to 2020 when the world came to a standstill caused by Covid, and the normssuddenly became isolation and avoidance of human contact. The world was grieving. We lost friends and family to this dreadful disease. We also lost human connection. I found myself catatonic at first, watching the news, not knowing what to do, and feeling terribly sad and angry. I was sad from the loss of life and freedoms and angry with the government for everything else. I felt betrayed and wanted to lash out, but I didn’t know how and where to do so. Every day my anger brewed deeper and stronger. While I was able to rely on my family and team for support and we created plans for moving forward with the business and helping others to cope during that time, I could still sense that anger brewing and boiling day by day. That was when I decided to seek help. I scheduled an appointment with a psychologist and one session of release became a weekly habit for over a year. These sessions helped me to understand where the hurt and anger were coming from and to release my thoughts and feelings without judgement. I didn’t need to make any plans because those were already happening. I just needed to look inward and honor what was going on inside me.

What was common about these two situations?
· I was experiencing challenges in my mind. My thoughts were getting in the way of me
showing up in the world as my best self.
· I needed help. I knew that having someone to talk to would be valuable to me in
processing my thoughts.

What was different about them?
· In my cancer experience, I had acceptance of my illness and felt a strong resolve to
overcome it, but I just didn’t know how I could move forward beyond the disease. I
needed help to imagine a different version of me and my future, and to begin taking
steps towards it.
· In my Covid experience, I was already moving forward with steps and externally felt
clarity about what I wanted to do. I needed help in unpacking the darkness that seemed
to be lingering in my thoughts despite everything going in the right direction.

As a professional coach myself, I knew that I couldn’t get through these situations alone. Having the right support in both these experiences was so critical for me and I feel very blessed to understand what I needed in those moments and to have direct access to both types of help. I know that many are still struggling and don’t realize they need help. And others know they need help but not sure what type of help and where to get it. I hope that, by sharing my own stories, it might shed some light and nudge others to seek support from the right sources.

Three Leadership Beliefs I Changed my Mind About (and how neuroscience helped me get there)

Posted by: Jackie Sarmiento Cañiza, Professional Certified Coach & Certified Neurotransformational Coach    |    Posted on . Posted in Journal.

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When did you last change your mind about something? Maybe it was this morning when you decided to wear a different pair of pants. Perhaps it was last night when you were planning a family vacation and thought of visiting a different place. It could even be last week when your friend convinced you that pineapple on pizza is actually yummy. We go through decisions like these so often we may not even realize just how much we change our minds about simple and not-so-simple things.

I’ve been reflecting about significant perspectives that I found myself re-thinking in the past few years, and one big theme is leadership. As a leader myself managing several businesses, who also works as a coach with a lot of leaders in organizations and teams, I’ve been trying to observe and understand what drives our behaviors and how we lead others. What practices help or hinder us from being our best as leaders? How can we continuously bring out the best in ourselves and our people?

In this learning journey, I have come to change my mind about how I should show up as a leader. A big contributor to these shifts is my continuous learning about our brain and how it works. Here are three things that have adjusted for me and the references that helped.

1. Leaders don’t show emotions.

I used to think that showing emotions as a leader, especially crying, is a sign of weakness. Now I know that my emotions are simply an indication of something that is valuable to me, and if I share that with my team, they will learn more about me and what I value, and even support my pursuit to be consistent with those values. Allowing my team members to share their feelings with me and with each other also helps us to create better connections, and work more cohesively. Thanks to the work of Dr. Lisa Feldman-Barrett who wrote the book “How Emotions are Made” and Dr. Susan David who wrote “Emotional Agility,” I have been learning to create better awareness of my emotions and what they mean to me, as well as cognizance of others’ emotions and what they mean to them.

2. Leaders don’t bring personal concerns to work.

I used to subscribe to the notion that one should “check their personal lives at the door” when they come to work every day. You are on “company time” so any time your mind wanders to personal thoughts such as a sick child or an argument with a family member, you are doing the company a disservice and should just learn to lock those thoughts away. Now I understand that I come to my workplace as a completely whole person who has various facets of my life, and if my brain is not at its best because those other facets are not going well, I will not be at my best for my company anyway. I love the work of Dr. Sarah McKay, neuroscientist and author of “In Her Head,” who shares a simple model of how one’s mindset, one’s environment and one’s physiological state all play a critical role in supporting a healthy brain. Integrating brain-healthy habits into my day no longer makes me feel guilty for spending time on myself. 

3. Leaders are direct and completely fact-based.

I used to believe that the best way of communicating is to be completely direct, objective and fact-based. Now I know that I also have to be held accountable for the impact of my message on others. How they receive my message is equally important in determining the effectiveness of our communication. Thanks to the lessons I learn from my favorite podcast Huberman Lab, hosted by Stanford professor Dr. Andrew Huberman, I understand how the different chemicals in our brains are triggered and how they influence our behaviors. 

By understanding the mechanisms of how our own mind works, I’ve learned to change my mind about what good leadership looks and feels like. I’m still learning and may continue to adjust some of my beliefs, but that is the value of continuous learning or neuroplasticity (the ability of the brain to form new connections). My encouragement to other leaders is to keep learning too. If the best athletes continue to practice their sport even after they’ve won several medals and trophies, then leaders should continue practicing their craft as well.

I’m also fascinated by neuroscience because it helps me to reinforce my belief that, while we might look and sound different from others and while our principles might be shaped by our environment and culture, underneath we are all the same. If we get better at understanding why and how we think, feel and behave, we might be more capable of looking at others past the prejudices and judgements and simply accept that we are all human beings doing the best we can to thrive.

Letting Go of Perfectionism

Posted by: Mia Del Rosario- Domingo, ACC    |    Posted on . Posted in Journal.

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We all want to do well. But what about when this desire to do well prevents us from even starting something?

I’ve been on a long journey of letting go of perfectionism and embracing who I am. I even started a community called The Parent in Progress to document my experience as a work-in-progress new parent and to support other new parents.

I am sharing a few things I’ve learned and reflected on in this journey.

I know that perfection is impossible, but why do I still want to be perfect?

“Progress over perfection” is an overused (but admittedly, appropriate) quote you’ll hear. But, why is it so hard to truly let go of perfection and embrace this mindset?

When I think about my personal definition of perfection, it’s this expectation that I have to do it all and I will do it without mistakes, without breaks and without help. Written down, it seems like such an unrealistic, impossible expectation of myself, doesn’t it? No human can meet that.

Perhaps, moving away from perfection means moving towards our own humanity. It is about accepting that we will make mistakes, we will need breaks, and we need others’ help. It is making the courageous choice to say “I am enough”.

Brene Brown expands on this beautifully in her book, The Gifts of Imperfection: “No matter what gets done and how much is left undone, I am enough. It’s going to bed at night thinking, ‘Yes, I am imperfect and vulnerable and sometimes afraid, but that doesn’t change the truth that I am also brave and worthy of love and belonging’.”

There is so much power and freedom in embracing and accepting who we are, as is, in this moment.

If I let go of perfection, will that mean I won’t strive to do my best?

Initially, I resisted this new mindset of “I am enough” because I thought it might mean that I wouldn’t want to improve and do my best anymore (and I’ve heard this resistance from others as well).

For me, this resistance comes from seeing the many ways that being a perfectionist has benefitted me to achieve a goal and to do good work. But, if I further reflect on it, I can recall the many times perfectionism has not helped me – the indecision, the countless unnecessary revisions, the stress of it all. I want a healthier way of approaching things.

I’ve realized that believing “I am enough” and wanting to improve is not an ‘Either-or’ situation; we can believe in both. This quote put it best:

Instead of perfection, what can I focus on instead?

In coaching, we believe that when our actions are aligned with our intention, we can create more sustainable change.

In overcoming perfectionism, this can mean shifting our mindset from the abstract, unrealistic ideal of perfection to clear, defined intentions and values that we personally hold important. We can reflect on what drives us and what’s behind this initial desire for perfection.

Some reflections questions we can think about:

  • How has perfectionism helped you? How has it not helped you?
  • What positive impact would believing “I am enough” have on you?
  • What is most important to you in life? What values do you want to live by?

By asking ourselves these questions, we can be clearer on what we really want. If the goals are clear, it is easier to work towards that goal.

There is no quick fix for perfectionism. It might never go away fully and certain situations may trigger us. At the end of the day, it’s about mindfully living out our intentions and values. It’s about celebrating ourselves and our progress.

How can embracing your imperfection and living more intentionally benefit you? Would you like support to make that happen? Get in touch with Haraya to see how coaching can help you.

Why Coaching in Education is a Big Win

Posted by: Mary Ann Barcelon, ACC    |    Posted on . Posted in Journal.

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I had been in the field of education for 12 years prior to joining APEC Schools. I have taught in several schools both here and abroad and in both the elementary and secondary levels. I had been a classroom teacher, a class adviser, a subject coordinator, and a teacher trainer. I could really say that I have done much in the academe that it is so easy to believe that we have tried almost everything with regard to improving the quality of the field. That was until I was introduced to Coaching.

I was first introduced to coaching through interactions and research in APEC Schools. We are fortunate to be managed not only by educators, but by people from various industries. And from them came the knowledge that once previously is only known from the world of business – they knew about coaching.

Our leaders were coached and in their own rights were coaching as well. They used it in their past companies in handling their people. They were also professionally developed using the same approach. They knew it worked and the benefits attached to it.

So when the idea of coaching was raised to me as a professional development tool for teachers, I got interested. This has not been done in any other educational institution just yet. To give a bit of background, most schools use the feedback approach. This approach is usually done after class observations by supervisors. As a general framework for this approach, the supervisor (1) asks what teachers think they did and didn’t do well, (2) shares what they think the teacher did and didn’t do well, and (3) decides on next steps.

This was the standard practice and APEC Schools did subscribe to this as well. And even if there are advantages, we recognised some downside to it, namely:

  1. It puts the supervisor as the expert, not the teacher.  This is an issue of empowerment.
  2. Its focus is narrow.  It dissects a very specific classroom scenario.  This is an issue of efficacy.
  3. It often makes teachers defensive.  It requires a very open teacher to not take the feedback personally.  This is an issue of motivation.

Given the disadvantages, we felt that the time was ripe for change.  To push for better quality of education, we have to push for better quality of teachers. We are already offering  them various skills training, professional development courses, support and supervision.  But there is one aspect that is sorely lacking – teacher empowerment and a mentality for self-direction. These things could not easily be honed through training and mentoring. So what is the solution? Coaching.

Believing in the power of Coaching, we took the leap and started our journey back in 2018. As a school, we didn’t have the budget so we had to find a way to make it more affordable.  We knew that a big chunk of what can cut the cost is if we do it internally.  So we “DIYed” building our coaching culture.  Here’s what we did.

  1. We assigned one person to attend the expensive coach training and have this person lead the coaching program of the school.  This person, in turn, trained our academic managers on coaching.
  2. We included coaching in the expected interactions types with teachers.
  3. We partnered with coaching institutions like Haraya Coaching to provide additional pro-bono coaching sessions to our teachers.

It has been five years since we started coaching in our school.  We are now in what Reza Rahmani, PCC, calls the embedding phase.  It is in this phase that organizations roll out coaching processes and programs. It is also in this phase that coaching is experienced not only by select leaders but by other members of the organization.  In our case, those are the teachers.  And though we are not yet at the transforming phase, which is the phase where coaching is more integrated in the organization’s system, we are already seeing results.  

  • Improved leadership.   Through coaching, our leaders found a new way to support teachers.  No longer is feedback their default.  No longer do they see themselves as experts.  They have transitioned to seeing their teachers as the more knowledgeable, more accountable person in the conversation.  Coaching became their way to support teachers more genuinely and effectively.
  • Increased empowerment of teachers.  Through coaching, teachers became more accountable.  Once the answers started coming from them instead of their supervisor, they owned the actions more.  They became empowered to drive the change they want to see in the classroom.  This practice directly impacted quality of delivery which has consistently earned highly in the organization’s Performance Assessment KRA.
  • Increased engagement.  The results of the 2021 Employee Engagement Survey showed a remarkable increase in overall employee engagement which is 5 points significantly higher than the 2017 results.  This score is further broken down into 90% favorable score on Training and Learning and 91% favorable score on Wellbeing.  It is to be noted that the Training and Learning score is significantly higher than the Education norm.

And to top it all off, very recently, we were recognized by ICF Philippines by bestowing upon us the inaugural 2022 Prism Award. This is a confirmation of the coaching culture we built in APEC Schools.  It is a milestone in our 5-year journey.  But it is not just a win for one school.  It is a win for the whole academic community as…

  1. It confirmed that coaching can be built and used in the education space.  Coaching is no longer a tool of companies.  It is also a developmental  tool of academic institutions.
  2. It showed that coaching can be affordable.  There are ways to make it less expensive.  Academic institutions can afford the investment.
  3. It proved that we can reinvent processes in education.  We can change practices that no longer work.  We can be more intentional in choosing techniques and tools to support our teachers.   We can be progressive. 

Given this meaningful journey of our institution, we can point out that coaching in the field of education works. It is an approach that, frankly speaking, should have been used for teacher development decades ago! We could have saved years on managing teacher burnout and lack of motivation.  We could have honed earlier on empowered, motivated and happier teachers.

As such, we want to encourage educational institutions to adopt a coaching culture as this could really be that transformative shift  we are all looking for.  Coaching in education is a big win for us.  Make it a win for you too.  

I have been in education for 20 years.  Admittedly, I have not seen everything, but I have seen a lot. And I am so blessed to have seen the day that coaching is used in the education space. Its not everyday you can say that you are a part of something done for the first time, but here I am – I am part of an institution that supports teachers through coaching and who develops their managers to be coaches. I have always been proud that I am an educator and now I am also deeply honored to be a coach. 

Mary Ann Barcelon, ACC
APEC Schools
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